


Sonata of a Courtship

by MarginalMadness



Category: Dragon Age II
Genre: Angst, Drabble Collection, F/M, Fluff, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-12
Updated: 2014-07-11
Packaged: 2018-02-08 12:03:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 2,711
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1940343
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MarginalMadness/pseuds/MarginalMadness
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>short glimpses of the courtship and subsequent relationship of Fenris and Bethany Hawke</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Overture

**Author's Note:**

> I set myself a challenge to write 26 drabbles, exactly 100 words each, based on a writing prompt challenge I'd had sitting around forever. All but one are 100 words, and last was 200, this posting puts them into chronological order.

He watches at the mage sister laughs and her small hand covers her mouth.

_Viper_. He thinks.

Her eyes, full of mirth, glance around at the other laughing occupants of the table finally falling on him. The light in her eyes dims briefly, before being filled with the fire of defiance.

“Yes?” She asks, sharply. Fenris opens his mouth to speak but closes it with a scowl. Hawke is a neutral ally right now, one he does not want to make an enemy of, but he continues to glare.

“Is there something you want, Fenris?”

_I want to hurt you._

 

* * *

Fenris didn’t remember saying the words or recall why, but the phrase _‘I hate you, you bitch_ ’ echoed in his head as Bethany’s fist made contact with his face. She had surprisingly, caught him off guard, and he stumbled against the wall, rubbing his jaw as he righted himself. Bethany looked murderous, the weight of her gaze daring him to retaliate. Hawke just shrugged, moving further along the docks while Isabela slipped an arm through Bethany’s, tactfully steering her away.

“Well, done kitten. Broody’s had it coming for far too long.”

_A fist_. He thought, following behind. _Not magic. Impressive._

* * *

 

“You remind me of me.” Said Bethany, casually, perusing the stalls of the Lowtown. “Hiding, my entire life, to avoid being caught by the Templars.” She stopped turning on him. “If you want to evade slavers you can’t look like you’re looking for them.”

His blood began to boil with the audacity of her words, he started to argue but she cut him off.

“The markings-“

“Are only part of the problem, trust me, you have to act like you belong.” She turned away and he relaxed his shoulders. Maybe getting comfortable in Kirkwall wasn’t the worst option after all.

* * *

 

Fenris sat by the fire, guilt and self-loathing washing over him, burning his skin. Bethany was everything he supposedly hated, yet he could not stop thinking of her. He thought of how she flaunted her power, walked around proudly with a staff at her back for all to see, glared at passers-by who may comment.

But that wasn’t her. She was reserved without weakness, kind to all, favoured healing rather than the flash of fire or ice. She was sunshine and sweetness, warmth and charm.

“I have twisted something beautiful to see what I want to see. I hate myself.”

* * *

 

“I was wrong about you.”

Bethany stopped in the crowded market and turned to the taciturn elf. “Sorry?” Fenris, made a show of looking at the soles of his feet. Since Marian had left for the Deep Roads, he had shown up every other day asking if she required accompanying anywhere. Bethany had the incessant notion that Marian forced him to babysit her.

“When we first met, I made some rash comments-”

“You called me a viper.” Bethany interrupted.

“As I said, I was wrong.” He said, straightening up and finally making eye contact. “I apologise.”

She smiled brightly. “Accepted.”


	2. Fugue

“Flower for the pretty lady?”

Fenris scowled in response.

Bethany laughed in response. “He’s just trying to sell his wares, Fenris. Relax.”

“I am not like you. I cannot so nonchalantly ignore the possible dangers.”

“You can be like me, you just need to…I have an idea.” Taking him by the vambrace, she pulled him through winding streets, up rickety stairs, until they reached a roof, overlooking, Lowtown. “This is my secret place.”

“I-“ Fenris paused. “I’m honoured you would share this with me.”

Bethany blushed. “You’re surprisingly good company.”

And if that made Fenris beam, neither of them tell.

* * *

 

She stumbled through Lowtown, Fenris beside her, steering her clear of hazards.

“You  _are_  very pretty.” Bethany slurred, as though they were mid conversation, turning on him.

“Uh…Sorry?” Fenris asked, blushing.

“Isabela, said you have pretty eyes, but everything…is pretty!” She said waving her hands.

“Especially when you smile…smirk…scowl…less.” Her candour surprised him and he smiled despite himself. “SEE! Pretty.” She pointed at his face, giggling. Suddenly, she gasped, covering her mouth with her hand.

“What is it?” Fenris asked looking around.

“I  _told you_ , you’re  _pretty_.” Bethany sighed seriously. “Maker. I’mmmmmmmm Drunk.” And then collapsed in a fit of giggles.

* * *

 

He stood at a precipice. Bethany’s stare held him still, every instinct in his body told him to turn, run. He could not. She asked again, question sounding distant, her gaze held him so.

“I want you to hate me.” He said, voice harsh as if the words were being forced from him against his will; perhaps they were. Confusion flashed in her eyes, pain, triumph, so many things and before he knew it he was moving towards her, holding her, kissing her. “You hating me would be easier than living with this, living with never-”

Her lips silenced him.

* * *

 

 _'Just wait until you’re reading to your own children.'_ Leandra called.

Fenris stilled and subtly shifted away from her on the seat. Leandra, didn’t know, whatever was between them was, so new, it was secret for now.

Still, Fenris’ reaction troubled her.

Pulled from her reverie, she found Fenris frowning, no longer reading the book of Children’s tales in his hand. “Would it be so bad?” She blurted, unthinking. “Children?” she finished.

“I’m…broken, a broken man." He said with such conviction it brokered no argument "I would not make a good father.”

Bethany nodded and returned back to the fairytale.

* * *

 

“Are you here to retrieve your pet?” He spat.

“Sorry?” She asked, halting at the doorway.

“Your pet elf runs off, and you hurry to retrieve it.”

“Is this about Hadriana?”

“Yes, this is about Hadriana.” He sneered.

“Why are you mad at me?” Bethany asks angrily.

“What has magic touched that it has not spoiled?”

“You think my magic has spoiled me?”

“Have you not spent your entire life, running? In fear of being taken from your family?”

Her anger deflates, replaced with something far more distasteful.

“I pity you.” She whispered, “You know nothing of sacrifice for love.”

* * *

 

He stalked towards her, his gaze predatory. Bethany took an involuntary step back, and for the first time ever, felt truly afraid of Fenris. He stood, towering over her and she found his gaze not hateful, but pained, confused and so much more. He ghosted his fingers over her curls, almost as though he were lost in memory

“Fenris?” She asked, voice small and wavering. “What are you-”

“I have been thinking of you.” He whispered. “In fact I have been able to think of little else.” _This is my desperation in action_. “Command me to go, and I shall.”

* * *

 

Fingers threaded through her hair, holding her impossibly close. His other hand hitched her bare leg up over his hip as he ground down, pushing her further into the mattress, her hands gently gripping the unmarked skin on his sides. Her gentleness was one of the things Fenris loved most about Bethany, but sometimes, like now, it drove him insane.

“Touch me.” He growled against her throat, as he rolled his hips moving inside of her.

Bethany gasped, arching, fingers flexing. “I don’t want to hurt-”.

Fenris silenced her with an intense kiss. “Being with you…this cancels out the hurt.”

* * *

 

Bethany marched across Hightown, ready to kick the arse of the Elf who had fled from her bed a week ago; mentally practicing her argument , a few colourful curses via Isabela thrown in. Heedlessly, she was almost knocked backwards, but a pair of strong, lyrium imbued, hands, caught her.

She stared up at Fenris, dolefully; argument forgotten.

“Idiot.” “I was coming to see you.” They spoke simultaneously.

A smiled tugged at the corner of his mouth. “Indeed I am. I thought I needed this…this solitude. I was mistaken.” He kissed her and it was all the apology Bethany needed.

* * *

 

“I want to need you.” Bethany said through tears. “But I don’t.”

Fenris stood rigid in his room, eyes wide, fist curling and uncurling at his sides. “Is this a joke?”

“I’m sorry.” She fiddled with her circle robes smoothing out imaginary wrinkles from her skirts. “It’s for the best.”

“How can you say such things?” Fenris snarled.

“I can’t have a life Fenris.” Bethany answered calmly, walking stiffly past him. “I don’t expect you to wait.”

And as her tears fell silently, she pretended not to hear the sobs and smashing glass behind her as she closed the door.

* * *

 

“How can you say such things?” Fenris snarled, the cold pit of dread settling in his stomach, spreading throughout his limbs.

“I can’t have a life Fenris.” Came her cruelly casual reply. “I don’t expect you to wait.” She left nonchalantly, as though she hadn’t just shattered his world.

Fenris let out a feral growl that broke into a, picking up an empty bottle and throwing it against the wall, paying no heed to where it landed, collapsing to his knees in front of the dying hearth, images of Bethany spread before it, plaguing him.

  _Wish I didn't love you._

* * *

 

“I’m sorry.” Bethany sobbed into his lap.

“You have nothing to be sorry for.” He soothed. “Your mother…”

“No, I do. I left you, walked away…then came running back…“

“Do not think on it...”

“I’m cruel, so cruel, using you this way.”

He turned her head, gazing into tear stained eyes. “You said you do not expect me to wait. You have too little faith, in my love for you, Bethany Hawke.” Taking her

hand, he laid soft kisses over her knuckles. Bethany smiled and for the first time that night, felt she may survive the death of her mother.

* * *

 

“You were right about me.”

“What do you mean?” Fenris asked, sitting up in his chair, addressing the woman in his doorway.

“It's safer, for everyone, for me, in the circle.” Bethany moved into the room, towards the elf, watching his jaw clenched painfully. “The whispers-”

“I do not believe it.” He stated as fact.

“It’s getting harder to resist. Being trapped in that place.”

“But you will.” He said firmly.

“How do you know?” Bethany asked, collapsing at his feet, dejectedly.

Fenris bent down to kiss the crown of her head. “Because I would never love a weak mage.”


	3. Coda

She found him sitting on the window ledge, the pale light of the moon flooding in and casting him in an ethereal glow.

He made the smallest inclination of his head as she approached. “Your sister loved me.” He whispered. Bethany halted. “And then stopped.” The meaning of the words hung in their air. “What if one day, you no longer love me, or Maker forbid I no longer love you.” He frowned, turning, pulling her close. “I need to want you. Loving you is the most important thing I’ve ever done.”

“Then love me.” She said with a kiss.

* * *

 

“I know her better than she knows herself.” Fenris said.

“No you do not.” Bethany objected. The rest of the group pretended to be engrossed in their cards. “Prove it.”

“You prefer your tea unsweetened, the scar behind your right ear from when you fell from a tree, you love to sing, despise an audience, your favourite time of day is dawn and the only reason you’re so affronted is because you think I don’t pay attention.”

“Broody, Sunshine, takes honey in her tea. Even I know that.” Varric interjected.

“That’s because I enjoy the taste of honey.” Fenris smirked.

* * *

 

“This isn’t about you at all.” Bethany sang, running a comb through her hair.

“So you just happen to take a fancy to wearing your hair up the day after I mention how distracting I find…” He reached up and ran a finger down the side of her neck.

“You mentioned that?” She smiled at him, over her shoulder. “I don’t recall.”

“I may have mumbled.” He said, grasping her by her hip and pulling her to him, her back flush against his chest, lips attacking the juncture neck and shoulder with teeth and tongue “My mouth was otherwise engaged.”

* * *

 

He held his breath as Alain dragged the dagger across his arm, more concerned with the women at the blood mages feet, than the mage himself. She awoke and righted herself but the ringing in his ears would not stop, the pounding of blood drowning out even the crashing of the waves around them.

His vision grew hazy, to the point he didn’t even realise Bethany was in front of him and calling his name. “Breathe, Fenris, breathe.” She soothed. His resulting gasp came out almost like a sob of relief. “I’m awake and you’re breathing and everything is fine.”

* * *

 

His lips ghosted over the shell of her ear.

“Beg.” He whispered, Bethany just giggled at him and the sound was the sweetest music to his ears. He pinned her arms beside her head, licking at the hollow of her throat and across her collarbone. “Beg, me.”

“No.” She replied, voice wavering. He moved down to her breasts, lips almost brushing over a nipple and repeated the word. Her voice was tight, strained, She arched up seeking contact. “Fenriiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiis. What are you trying to do to me?”

“I want to break you.” He smiled, delicately licking her nipple. “Now. Beg.”

* * *

 

“Carver used to scare me with stories about the circle, told me horrible things they’d do to the mages.” Bethany sighed curled up in the comfort of Fenris’ arms. “Father was so angry when he found out; gave Carver extra chores for a month.” She laughed; tightening her hold on him as he lazily ran his fingers though her hair. “I used to imagine a handsome, knight, on a white stallion breaking into the circle to save me, taking me away to be his bride.”

“And now?” Fenris mused.

She giggled, laying a quick kiss against his chest. “You’ll do.”

* * *

 

Fenris watched as Bethany idly twirled a lock of hair around her finger, eyes closed, her naked body basking languidly in the stream of sunlight that filtered through his broken roof. He lay, equally as naked, propped up on one elbow, lolling in the ease of the summer afternoon’s warmth “I have been thinking on something I said, a long time ago.” Bethany only hummed lazily in acknowledgment. “I said I am not like you, but, with you here, it seems I can be like you.” Her eyes remained closed but a smile spread across her face, as her idle hand moved to stroke his calf. “I just needed to find someone to feel safe with; I needed to find a home.”

Her eyes finally peeked open, shining happily, her voice was thick with emotion. “You’re my home too, Fenris.”

He sat up, cupping her face, regarding her with such reverence it made it difficult for Bethany to breathe.

He ghosted his lips over her own whispering “Marry me.” Her eyes widened in shock, fighting to comprehend his words. “Marry me this day, we’ll go to the Chantry and have Sebastian do it.”

And with a sigh she breathed, “Yes."

* * *

 

“I always wondered what this’d be like.” Fenris murmured, rubbing slow circles over Bethany’s back, watching the storm lash against the porthole.

Bethany lifted her head from the bucket between her knees, looking the very epitome of pathetic. “Running f…your life? Thedas, ripping…self apart?” The boat tilted and Bethany reacquainted herself with the bucket.

“I meant breaking into the Gallows, slaughtering every Templar in the way and rescuing you.” Fenris said, kissing her on the shoulder.

“-imagined more sunset.” Echoed from the bucket. “Maybe a white steed or two.”

Fenris smiled. “I imagined you. Everything else was superfluous.”


	4. Dissonance

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AU setting, did not fit with the rest of the drabbles

The frown that formed on his face when she presented herself at Danarius’ court was still present when he cornered her alone in the corridor.

“You remind me of someone,” he growled, sounding conflicted. Bethany squashed the ray of hope that almost erupted inside of her, not wanting to risk this one chance to save him from Danarius. “Or…something.”

“Oh?” She asked, feigning nonchalance. “And who or what is that?”

“I do not clearly recall, I have recently been injured, my…memories…”His frown deepened and his hand moved to brush a stray curl over her shoulder. “Sunshine.” He whispered.


End file.
